This one is titled How to Meet and Get Asian Girls, and I have to warn you that it may not actually lead you to meet or get Asian girls. It's all speculation at this point, but I hope it works out for someone out there.
01: The first thing you need to know is that Asian girls are better than you:
Even the fat ones. (fat asian girls? don't be silly. they don't exist except in movies like donnie darko)What's the coolest place that you hang out at? Say it to the monitor now. Okay. That place is lame, and boring. You're hurt? Get used to it, Asian girls are not interested in your simple likes and wants! You boring boring boy!
02: Asian girls can be found most commonly at the library and at the supermarket: (how did he know i worked at Jewel?!)
Your best bet is to go to the library, since if they see you at the supermarket, they'll see what you're buying, and no one wants to get with a guy who's walking a cart full of hair-removal cream and pizza pops. (or other obscene products *cough george and stan*) At least at the library you can pretend to be literate and somewhat human, you monkey-man you.
03: The education thing: Asian girls are almost always guaranteed to be smarter then you are. In the event that the one you're interested in isn't smarter than you, odds are she's the rare breed that we call "the totally dumb girl" (there's one in every group), and she will do whatever you want her to.
This may or may not be a good thing for you.
04: Asian girls tend to have pretty strict and/or controlling parents. (ha...really) Also, unless you are Asian, they'll probably secretly (or not secretly) hate you. (that's for sure,. and it applies to all boys..even asian ones) This adds stress to her life, if she wants to be with you at all, and will strain the relationship (even if it's a stalker-stalkee relationship to begin with as you follow her around the supermarket).
05: Asian girls like presents. All girls like presents. ("tru dat") They're all about the bling (what is this "bling" that you speak of?) , and you'd better step up, because if there's another guy out there who can provide her the glitter and toys, her parents will like him more, she'll like him more, and you'll be back to standing outside the 7-11 asking people to buy you smokes as a pick-up line.
har har har. fun stuff.
-g1