I think it bothers me that he glorifies what we..err...what he does. I think we both try to outdo one another with our bold stories, whether it's trying to gloat or impress. The only difference is he does it with no regret and it's not just circumstantial. Show me your cocaine 'tools', your bong, and yes please roll me another joint. I guess I do try to paint myself into some sort of image that I'm not, or maybe I am. I don't try too hard. I am just at the right place at the right time. Nowadays I only have one thing in common with people and I am interested in little else. I'm a fraud, in so many ways. I can't be fucked up without being conciously aware of everything. I need to get better at drinking. I don't know what other people think of me, and I am afraid to find out.
Sometimes, I look at unassuming asexual asian guys and think how my life would be more normal/better if I had just dated one of them...but then again...I'd be bored. At the end of the day, if I want to get really fucked up, I know who to call...and that's all that matters.
"Don't degrade yourself the way that I do cause you don't depend upon the shit that I use to make my moods improve"--
-g1