darn it! i sounded so happy then. i wish i could carry around this diary so anytime i feel "inspiration", i could jot it down or w/e. only i can't lug a comp around.
or i could carry a notebook around and be one of those poetic figures who are always seen on park benches in deep meditation in their journals...wearing something artistic. unique. individual. constantly daydreaming, lost in another world...well that last one's not relle a problem. but ppl would think i was crazy. or weird. even my friends. that totally sux. i think that would be the most interesting things in the world, just to do w/e you feel, hehe, sounds hippy-ish. but i am not a hippy.
why don't ppl ever do anything interesting like that? everyone here is so normal!!!! i'm not relle sure what "here" refers to but, it sux! maybe that's why i'm so easily bored by guys @ hs, cuz they're all the same!!! grrrr...why can't they do something interesting for a change?
see, the way i see it, jane eyre has it pretty good. not only is she independant, but she's appreciated for her un-normal-ness by the person she most appreciates! not that i wanna date a 35 yr old man (eck!) but in that time, they were perfect for each other b/c they're not the perfect romance. they're not all mushy and, "oh my beautiful darling" and all that sickening stuff. they argue and fall in love. "there's always something so tragic about a hopeless romantic..." yes, i think so.
but i think that if i did think that guys actually all were interesting like i did in seventh grade, i would be in big trouble. i would've had my heart broken about a million times. as it is, it's yet to be still. i can live w/ it.
oh, i'm just ranting. but that's what this is for, rite? ranting. from now on, all i'll ever do is rant.
~G2~