hmm..disha. i knew a disha. look at the answering machine again. Yalovestkaya. [sp?..i never knew how to spell it] damn it. that's inna. god damnit. my old best friend. what the hell? as if depression can't sink any lower. value of friendship. damn we were so damn close. i called her everday. we did everything together. what happened? i moved. so what? why aren't we friends anymore?
what do i expect? it's been FIVE freaking years since we were in the 6th grade together. but so what? did she not recognize my voice? did she not know it was me? why did she call disha? disha moved 2 glenbrook north [she called me a snob in 5th grade] why does inna still keep in touch with her? when we were best friends? when i told her about everything! when she stalked adam for me, had long conversations with jared, came to the damn chinese new years party with me? i don't get it.
what if this will happen to all my friends? god damn when was the last time i talked to julie? why don't i freaking call her? i have her cell number? too busy? too busy for ur BEST friend? that's bullshit. but why isn't she calling me either? too busy for friends. too busy...damn it. life's too short to be that damn busy.
what if it's like that in 5 years. ill walk down the street, ill see you, recognize you, and just keep walking? what if that happened? "wrong number" "oopz". wrong number? i used to dial ur fucking number every day. 2x a day. julie, i can dial ur number in the dark. we talked for 5 hrs once. u remember that??? and now we don't even have time to write each other emails.
goddamn friendships. inna, call me. i wana talk to you again. like old times. like as if u remember. you remember don't you? "is disha there.."
fuck. no it's shan. remember? ur best friend?....sigh***.....
-g1